It’s Not You, It’s Your Manager
Over half of the people leaving companies are really leaving their bosses, according to research.
Have you ever found yourself wondering if the real issue at work is you — or your manager? If you're constantly feeling undervalued, overworked, or stuck in a toxic cycle, it might be time to take a closer look at your leadership relationship. From what we’ve learned, working with hundreds of different managers, you can often characterize the most difficult ones to work with into four types.
Do you recognize your manager (or yourself) in any of these?
The Know-it-All
Have you ever shared an idea, only for it to be dismissed or overshadowed by their “better” idea? A bad manager often assumes they know everything and treats your suggestions as irrelevant. This behavior stifles creativity and discourages collaboration, leaving you feeling unheard and unimportant.
Red Flag Example: You propose an innovative solution to improve team efficiency, but your manager barely listens and immediately overrides it with their own idea.
Turn-it-Around Tip: Give them the feedback to help them understand how their behavior is making you feel. Use phrases like, “Something I have noticed is… this is how it has affected me…”
The Panicker
Does every task feel like a crisis? Bad leaders tend to thrive on urgency and chaos, constantly creating a stressful work environment. This reactive leadership style not only drains the team’s energy but also makes it nearly impossible to focus on long-term goals.
Red Flag Example: You’re working on a planned project when suddenly your manager announces an “urgent” issue that derails everything—again.
Turn-it-Around Tip: Suggest adding more structure to how the team’s work is planned and prioritized. Use a kanban tool to visualize and prioritize what work is “in progress” for the week—this helps your manager see all the work that needs to be paused and delayed to allow for emergencies.
The Ghoster
A good manager invests time in their team. If your manager always seems too busy to meet with you, cancels 1:1s last minute (if they happen at all), or only catches up in rushed conversations, it’s a sign they’re not prioritizing your growth or needs.
Red Flag Example: Weekly meetings are either skipped or rescheduled last minute, leaving you with no opportunity to align on goals or share your challenges.
Turn-it-Around Tip: Leaders are responsible for providing you with the alignment and support you need to do your work. Practice radical candour by being clear about what you need from your manager to be successful. Use a phrase like, “Something that I need from you is…”
The Demotivator
Do you only hear from your manager when something’s wrong? Bad leaders often neglect to acknowledge or celebrate their team’s achievements, focusing solely on what could be better. Over time, this lack of recognition erodes motivation and morale.
Red Flag Example: After completing a major project successfully, your manager skips the praise and dives straight into what could have been improved.
Turn-it-Around Tip: Volunteer to run a retrospective at the end of a project or sprint. This session allows for the project team to capture what went well (and celebrate it!) and what didn’t go so well (and learn from it!). This format creates space for the team (and manager) to reflect, learn and grow together.
Am I Stuck with a Bad Manager?
If you’ve identified red flags in your manager’s behavior, which are contributing to a negative work experience, it’s worth reflecting on your working relationship and action plan. When delivered with intentionality and care, feedback can help colleagues, including managers, see their blind spots. Are you comfortable giving feedback and making suggestions to try to improve the situation?
Remember, the grass is always greener, until you find the same character type on the other side of the fence. My advice: before leaving your job to leave your boss, see if you can turn it around, for you and for your manager.
What Does Great Leadership Look Like?
A great leader is more than just someone who sets targets or oversees projects. Compassionate leadership is the hallmark of truly excellent management. Such leaders not only invest time in their team members, but also care about their well-being, growth, and success. They celebrate wins, guide through challenges, and create an environment where people thrive—not just professionally, but personally as well.
Great leaders do these things:
They check in on how you’re doing—not just what you’re doing.
They advocate for a healthy work-life balance and actively help reduce burnout.
They provide constructive feedback while also celebrating your achievements.
Great leaders uplift their teams, balance ambition with empathy, and foster trust and collaboration. Strive for a workplace that values and invests in developing great leadership—whether you’re the employee or the manager.
